Happy Annibirthmasary!

On December 15, I surprised Trevor in El Salvador for our two-year anniversary. Our disciplers from San Luis Obispo blessed me with a ticket as we have committed to a year of missions and would be apart for a year and

 a half. 

It was the greatest blessing to both of us! Ever since he left in August, we've been able to communicate with each other through Skype, which is an online video phone call. When I got to El Salvador, some of my best friends who are on his team came to pick me up at the airport and took me back to their house. Trev and the other guys on the team were out running some errands (and killing time) as I set up my surprise at the girls' house. I went upstairs and signed onto Skype in my friend's room. When he got there, the rest of the team told him I was waiting to talk to him online. He and I started a conversation, like any other....only I was in the room right next to him instead of miles away. For our anniversary present, I gave him our journal that we've written back and forth to each other over the years. As we went through it together, I suddenly 'had to use the bathroom.' 

"I'm sorry, I'll be right back! But look in the pocket in the back of the journal, there's one last surprise for you.."

As he opened the pocket, he pulled out all my boarding passes that I stuck in there from my LA, Miami, and San Salvador flights to go see him. Confused, he flipped through the boarding stubs as I ran outside to the balcony where he was sitting. With wide eyes he dropped the passes and sat up...and for about 5 minutes straight, said nothing but "Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?.."

It was so surreal. 

To be able to hug him again, smell his scent, even just see his smile face to face and not over a screen...it was the most beautiful moment that brought me to tears.

That week, we spent time encouraging one another, enjoying being in each other’s presence again, observing his leadership on the team and being so proud of him, having deep conversations about the Lord’s vision and plan for us now and in the future, and even enjoying the simplicity of holding hands again. We were able to celebrate our 2 year anniversary, his birthday, and an early christmas in a month that we thought we'd have to endure apart from each other. 

It was such a week to remember and a week that refreshed my soul in so many ways. God called us out this year and I know and trust that He will sustain us. But I love that He is a God who loves to bless us. I realize that sometimes God gives us things we don’t really need, but He blesses us just because he understands how much we desire it. And just like a father will give his child a new toy, or a trip to Disneyland, or something the child does not need, but he blesses him because he delights in seeing his child filled with so much joy; I feel like my Father in heaven has given me an opportunity to see the man I love, simply because

 He delights in seeing me find joy in the midst of His blessings. 

Now I have to leave him again as we endure a year apart. But God has blessed us up to this point and I know He will only continue to do so, even if we're miles away.

good-byes

Today I had to say good-bye to some of my closest friends, mentors, bible studies, and meaningful relationships as the Lord reminded me of how faithful He has been in using so many people in my life. Even though I’m only going for a year, there is something about saying “good-bye” that causes the heart to reflect on how deeply we value those we love. And I am so grateful that there are so many people in my life whom saying “good-bye” to is difficult. It just makes me realize how many people I am truly blessed with, and how many people I really do love. 

I miss all of you already.

9 hidden lettes, one lucky girl

On Dec. 6 at 5:00 am, I woke up to the unpleasantly fierce vibrations of my phone. With my eyes half open, I read the screen that blinded my eyes with the flashing text: "Trev CALLING." Knowing he's one to enjoy his sleep, I worriedly picked up. I was right. He does love his sleep. But he also loves loving me well. And today, that meant a big surprise.

After being instructed to dress warm and hop in the car, I found a letter taped onto my steering wheel. Keep in mind, Trev lives over 3,000 miles away in the middle of El Salvador. How he managed to do all this...I have no idea. But he's an incredible man; I know that much. So I got into the car and read my first letter. On the passenger seat was a Starbucks card and my ipod waiting to be played with a playlist he titled "For Ali from Trev." I was told to go to Starbucks, grab myself some coffee, listen to his playlist and head out to Montana de Oro where I would find my next letter.

My second letter was found under the bench where he gave me a new purity ring two years ago. It was a day significant to both of us and is now a place that marks so much of the beauty in our relationship. The letter told me to spend some time enjoying the sunrise, the beauty of God's creation, and praising our Father for his faithfulness in our lives. I did just that, and was brought to tears as my grateful heart was overwhelmed that morning.

Letter number three was found in the trunk of my car, taped to the back of three colorful pictures that made my heart smile. After going home and getting ready, I met the Kromhout family at noon. As I pulled up to the front of the house, Karlyn, Grant and Pierson stood in the driveway each wearing a santa hat, waiting to give me my fourth letter. Trev and I have had the privilege of watching and taking care of the Kromhout kids for over two years now. They are like family to us and some of our favorite memories have been in that house together. One of the hardest things about leaving for a year is leaving the people you love. So Trev arranged for the family and I to spenext nd time together for one of the last times before saying good-bye. We went Christmas tree shopping, put up lights, and then I was sent to my fifth letter which was going to be at a Woman's Event with Campus Crusade.

Filled with anticipation, I drove to the place where I would find my next "clue." As I walked into the door, girls rushed me with smiles and nudges asking me how my day was going. How did everyone know about this but me? I am one difficult girl to surprise, but apparently he knows how to pull it off really well. All giddy and excited, I gladly shared all the details when I spotted my letter from across the room. Allison, my discipler (or spiritual mentor) whose husband is also Trev's discipler, called me over with a dozen roses and Letter 5 in hand. Allison and her husband Joe are two of our biggest supporters and most influential people in our lives. We love them dearly, which is why Trev asked her to be a part of my special day. Opening the letter, I was told to go to Cuesta Park where had our first date.

The next letter I found was under a bench sitting beside the creek. Trev and I had some of the most Spirit-filled conversations at this park, where we were able to experience God's abundant grace in and through each other. The letter told me to spend some time alone with the Lord, praying and thanking Him for the grace He has poured upon our relationship. Amazing Grace is our favorite hymn that we cannot help but to cry to every time we hear it. Alone by the quiet creek, I sang loud and unashamed. It was a beautiful day for praising my King. Towards the end of my time, I received a phone call from him asking me how my day was going. I could tell the excitement in his voice as I shared how perfect every little detail has been. One of his greatest joys is making me happy...and he does it so well. Over the phone, he told me to head back home where I would find my next letter taped behind the sign "Sycamore Dr" on my street.

If you're following along, we're now at letter number 7. After struggling to rip it down from the sign that's twice my height, I was finally allowed to rest. And that's exactly what I did. I came home, fell onto the first available couch and slept. I took about an hour nap and then got ready for a dinner out with my roommates. Reservations were made he said, for 7:00. So I quickly got ready and jumped in the car with my friends to finish our night. We drove to Yanagi's which is Trev and my favorite restaurant. He's friends with all the sushi chefs behind the counter and hugs the hostess at every visit. As I walked into the door, the first person I see is Trevor's mom who drove 3 hours just to see me that night. Next to her, sat Trev and my closest friends down a long table at the restaurant. Each were there to wish me a happy early anniversary with Trev. His mom handed me a small gift as his sister passed me the 8th letter. I opened my present which was a little pocket booklet that had pictures of us from over the years. The first page read, "This little book is...for whenever you feel lonely..for whenever you see no end in sight..for whenever you need to laugh..for whenever you need to remember.."

After an amazing dinner with the people I love, I came home, fell on my bed, and called Trev to thank him. My cheeks hurt from smiling so much. It was the most amazing day I've had apart from him..though I couldn't have felt closer. After we hung up I changed into my PJs and just as I was about to lay my head to down to sleep..I found the last letter on my pillow. A beautifully written letter to end my day with a final phrase.."You are worthy to be pursued."

If there is any man who helps me to see and understand God's Love better..it is Trev.

I am one lucky girl.

home sweet home

As many of you know, housing has been one of the biggest prayer requests for our team. Being the first STINTers to launch a movement in South Africa, there are already so many unknowns that we are going to have to figure out as the year progresses. To pick up my life and move first thing into a hostel...wasn't the most comforting thought. But if it was God's will, we were willing to follow. But praise HIM, that He had greater things in store for us all along.

This month, we received wonderful news of a housing opportunity in Pretoria, South Africa. We gladly accepted! It is a beautiful 5-6 bedroom house, fully furnished, with an incredible backyard! It is conveniently located 8 miles from campus and sits in a nice, safe part of town. The women on our team will live here and this will be our "home base" where we will have team meetings, invite students over for special events, dinners, and fellowship activities. Not only will this be a comforting place for us to stay, but a wonderful place for ministry. Praise God! He provided us with more than just a house...He blessed us with a home.


come take a look!...

here is our kitchenette and sunroom:


our tv/living room:


our main kitchen:


one of the bedrooms:


and our beautiful backyard!:

Faithful to Answer

These past four months have been a rollercoaster of a ride. From spending my last moments with Trevor during the summer, to meeting my team and casting vision for our trip, to starting Fall Quarter at Poly and diving into the different ministries here, raising support, and now planning and preparing to leave in just two months. As I sat down to write about some updates for this past month, I had a hard time coming up with anything at all. It feels like my life has been going full speed and the only thing I ever seem to write about are what I’ve done, what I’m doing, what I still need to do, and the mix of all my emotions that come along with it. Not that that’s necessarily a bad thing; I do hope you enjoy and find encouragement in hearing about what I’m learning, doing, and going through. But I realize there is so much more going on here, than just what I’m doing. GOD, is doing things far beyond anything I expected. As I have prayed and as you have prayed…HE has been faithful to answer.

I thank God for the protection of unity within our team. As national staff in South Africa suggested we split our team into two groups for the year, it became an unsettling idea for us in many different ways. Dividing our team would not only make intimacy among the group difficult throughout the year, but it also meant a lot more safety precautions for all of us. Half of our team would be placed in Johannesburg full time while the other half of us lived in Pretoria. There would only be two men, opposed to four men, caring for and watching the women on our team, in each group. As we held this idea out with open hands, we prayed God’s will would be to keep us together. Waiting in anticipation, God was faithful to answer our prayers. Our team will not be split and we will all be living in Pretoria for the year! I can’t even begin to tell you what a relief it is for all of us and how incredibly grateful we are that God has protected our team from the possibility of dividing in two.

I thank God for His provision over my support. The last week of October, I held a support night at my house for college students and friends to come hear about the vision for South Africa and how they can help. Many people were out of town that weekend, a lot of people intended to come but ended up having other plans, and some were simply not interested. As I handed out invitations throughout the week, I was clueless as to how the night would turn out. College students, who would much rather be doing something other than hear about missions on a Saturday night, already had little to no money in their pockets. But college students, are also some of the most willing and generous people to give. It was a shot in the dark and a huge step of faith, but God heard my prayers and faithfully answered them, once again.Over 20 students filled the backroom of my house, squeezing onto our couches, filling the carpet space on the floor, and setting up dining room and desk chairs in all the open spaces. I was able to share with them how God has personally called me to go this year, why South Africa is a strategic and effective place for ministry, what our team will be doing once we get there, and how they each can specifically help. As I shared our promo video with them and a slideshow of pictures from previous teams, I watched the Spirit of the Lord move in that room, capturing the hearts of my peers as they were compelled by the needs of this country. I finished the night opening it up to any questions they had. It was amazing how quickly these students caught onto the vision, how involved they wanted to be in the process of me going, and how quick they were to respond in obedience. It was the most encouraging time I’ve had all quarter. I didn’t expect students to give anything that night, and told them I would follow up the next week with a phone call. But God had different plans, and put it on some of these students’ hearts to give immediately. I went to bed that night with $600 in one-time checks, a few monthly commitments, and a thousand praises for my King.

And lastly, I thank God for the abundant joy He has daily filled my soul with this past month. I think I am starting to finally realize, not simply by the knowledge of my mind, but realize through the experience of my heart, the difference between happiness and joy. Comparing last quarter to this quarter paints the perfect picture of how God is growing me in this area. As I look back at the state of my heart last quarter, I just see a big mess of emotions tagging along with my emotion-based faith. There were absolutely wonderful days where I experienced happiness, smiles, and laughter, but they became so fleeting. I began to see fear, anxiety, and doubt arise when the storms hit, when temptation to sin became stronger, when more of life felt less in my control. The difference with joy is that it’s not really an emotion that comes and goes. But it’s a fruit of the Spirit; a state of being that is forever constant. This past month, I have experienced and incredible joy that has consumed every part of me. Whether circumstances are good or trying, my joy has remained. Twice this week I accidentally, but maybe not coincidentally, came upon these verses in Scripture: “Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again – rejoice!...Don’t worry about anything, instead pray about everything” (Ph 4:4,6). “Always be joyful. Never stop praying” (1Th 5:16-17). I think it’s interesting how joy is a command before prayer is in these verses. But I think I’m starting to understand why this is so important. The only way we are able to find and maintain constant joy in our life, is when the truths about God’s Word, His character, and His promises, become a reality in our lives. It’s when we no longer just know it in our heads but we believe it in our hearts, and we experience His truth in the innermost parts of our soul. When this becomes true of us, we cannot not experience joy. There is no way our lives can be so intimately involved with the Creator of the Universe and not be consumed in every part with joy. And when joy comes from an understanding of who God is, I think then is when we can come to Him in prayer, petitioning for His will to be done, His glory to be shown, and our hearts to be aligned with His. So with an overflow of abundant joy, I come praying. I pray for the joy of the Lord to consume and overflow from every African student and child.


And knowing my God, I know He will be faithful to answer.

SLO-ing down...

It's the end of September and I only have three months left until I leave for South Africa! Time is flying by and I'm getting so excited to pack up my stuff and board that plane. I moved into my house in SLO and settled down a little bit, but felt like I was living out of a suitcase. Everything seemed so temporary and though I was physically still here, emotionally I was already living in Africa.

But God spoke to my through His faithful and living Word. Psalm 95:6-7 reads, "Come, let us worship and bow down. Let us kneels before the Lord our maker, for he is our God. We are the people he watches over, the flock under his care. If only you would listen to his voice, today." I began praying that the Lord would show me His purpose here in SLO. I want to prepare my heart for South Africa and the ministry He is calling me to next year...but I don't want to be living for it and miss the opportunities He's given me right now. I know that God doesn't want me to just sit around, waiting for time to pass. He has such a purpose for me this fall quarter and I want to be a good steward of where He has me today. As I prayed for God to reveal the ways in which He wanted to use and grow me here in SLO, He answered immediately and my eyes were opened to new opportunities to bless, and to be blessed.

This quarter I will continue to lead the same bible study that I began last year. The girls in my study are now sophomores, mature in their faith, eager to learn, ready to grow, and excited to be used for God's kingdom and glory. They encourage and challenge me in ways I can't even explain to you and I am reminded of my purpose here, because of each one of them. The house that I am living in, though it's the same little blue house on Sycamore Drive, it looks and feels more different than it ever has. We have three new roommates living with us to substitute our places while three of us leave for STINT, and though I miss our "family," God has opened my eyes to see so much purpose in each woman living in our home. I have enjoyed the hour-long conversations we've had about who God is and how to experience His love. I have enjoyed sharing my testimony with these girls and seeing their eyes light up at the story of God's grace and redemption as they are captivated by how person God is in my life. I have enjoyed having them ask questions that cause me to dig deeper into Scripture. God has shown me so much purpose in living at home, with new roommates, new relationships and new opportunities...and again I am reminded of my purpose here because of each of them. This quarter, I joined a new bible study, in addition to the one I have been involved in since freshman year, and I am so challenged by each woman in that group. They are women who are marked by faith, by love, by grace, and they exude such a beautiful presence that draws me closer to the Lord. I have been so encouraged by these women as they offer me so much love and support during this time of transition in my life. I am greatly blessed and reminded of my purpose here in SLO...because of each of them. This quarter, I get to play and hang out with 4 of my favorite children of all time (though babysitting). But even though it's my job, I can't possibly consider it work for all the joy that I get to experience with these kids. Karlyn, Grant, Pierson and Mabel are some of my greatest joys here in SLO and in my time spent with them, I am reminded of the child-like faith, the innocence, and the purity of a child that God calls me to have. And in each of them, I am reminded of my purpose here in SLO once again. AS I started my classes and introduced myself to some new classmates, God opened doors for me to have conversations about my faith with many of them. I was able to share my upcoming trip to Africa and how it was God who compelled me to go. I'm excited for these new relationship is my classes and for opportunities for God to use me to draw in the souls of these students closer to Him.

My excitement for South Africa continues to grow each day as the Lord prepares my heart for ministry there. My prayers have become so much more fervent as the time grows closer for us to leave. But in my excitement to go and be sent, I have also learned to slow down...and enjoy the purpose He has called me to, today. I love that God is so intentional in His plans for us. I love that I can be here in SLO, with full faith and confidence in knowing that He has me here for a reason. It's not that I happen to still be here and in His faithfulness He will use it for good. But rather it is in His faithfulness, that He has intentionally called me to be here and in His faithfulness that He will use me for His purpose.

One Family: an answered prayer

Praise the Lord!
Some of you may have been aware, but during Global Briefing in August my team had discussed the possibility of splitting in two. The national staff in Pretoria wanted us to be working on the university campus in Johannesburg as well as in Pretoria. Depending on how much time the nationals wanted us in Johannesburg, the idea was thrown out there that our team would split into two groups. Half of us would live in Johannesburg doing full time ministry in that city while the other half of us lived in Pretoria. This was a huge concern for our team as you can imagine our hesitations to split up. For one, we already feel like a family. We did not want to split up the unity of our group and split our ministry in two. Our vision and hope was to go into South Africa as a team, as one family, and serve that country together. Secondly, safety was a huge concern for many of us women as well. Johannesburg has an extremely high crime rate and to have our team split with less people working in that city, let alone living in that city, was a huge concern for many of us. As we discussed our thoughts as a team, it was encouraging to see the attitude of every member reflect that of honesty yet complete surrender. "My heart says stick together, but God's will be done, not ours."

All praise to the Father who aligned our hearts with His and whose will was to have us stay as one team. I just received news that we will not be splitting into two groups and we will live as a family in Pretoria for the year. We will be doing ministry in Johannesburg, but will not be living there and will have control of commuting in and out of the city.

Praise God for His provision and His faithfulness. And thank you to everyone who has been praying on our behalf. Your prayers have been answered, and an overwhelming sense of peace now rests upon our team. Thank you.